Red Goddess Rising

 You don’t know me You see a woman Maybe you’ve heard a rumor But you don’t know My story My truth You would rather Create a character For your own amusement  I could tell you the truth But you prefer fiction There was a time When I was younger That I would have appeased you And gladly stepped into The role you had assigned to me But that girl is gone My acting days are behind me The only part I play now Is me In all of my truth In all of my glory The good, the bad The failures and the triumphs  The mistakes and the gifts I have bestowed on so many.  You don’t know me But if you did  You would be shocked.  How much more interesting I am Then the lady you chose to see And pretended to know.  You don’t know me  And you never will You are not worth my time You want comic book But I am true literature  A character and a story For all the ages. 

  You can’t know me You can’t know me  because I don’t know me You wonder why I change everyday  So do I I’m a series of constant parallels  I’m loud and brash I’m quiet and sullen You ask questions  But can’t find answers  You put together the pieces But nothing ever fits  The puzzle changes Whenever you think You have it figured out An enigma Not from this time Or this space Her spirit is wild  It cannot be tamed She gets less trainable As the years go by You just don’t know Is she happy or is she sad Even she problems doesn’t know

Am I what you see What you think What you think you know Your perceptions validated Or am I what I think I am What I long to be What I deny What I pretend to be Where is the truth Is it what you think  What you believe  What you refuse to learn What you refuse to accept I am my truth I am me  The shapeshifting entity The ever changing vibrational waves I move with them Trying not to drown Stay afloat Ride the waves Try to enjoy the journey I’m still alive

  Consciousness awakens  the eyes open  daylight appears  another day  another chance  another risk  the possibilities are endless happiness  sadness  love  hate  anger  every moment unknown  the awakening is a gift  yet a curse

This poor girl How does she do it Still standing  Usually smiling Always a kind word There when you need her You wonder why she still believes  Considering all the pain It’s all perception she says Alter your view It’s a choice  Not a victim She’s a survivor 

  Missing so many little moments Choosing the demon instead Time I won’t get back Memories I will never have Clock is ticking loudly Telling me to live It’s a gift Stop throwing it away  It’s all here for you All your wants Desires Dreams The universe  wants you to partake But you deny it You regret  but can’t change The pattern of what has become The only way  You have ever know To cope To feel normal To fit in Because the truth is too raw It will cut you open and gut you To your core Your soul  You know Will be lost forever So you continue to tempt fate Knowing you don’t deserve  Another day

Red Phoenix rising Wings pulling and stretching  Gasping for fresh sir Away from the ashes Which previously consumed her The hell fire which enveloped her Are no more She never accepted the punishment given Her worth is worth so much more  And now she knows And will never forget The free bird  She is now And always was 

  Red Goddess Fly You have earned your wings Trust yourself and jump  Out into the abyss before you Turn the fear inside out Believe the Universe will not Allow you to fail Red Phoenix Rise From the ashes of your past It was all to teach you lessons And build your strength  Leave the past behind Never look down again The time has come Sit back and enjoy The fruits of your labor The Universe is ready To bestow upon you Your deepest desires  Open your arms wide And accept it all.